Ever felt like you don't have a way out and you will be fucked up no matter what you do? Well that's kind of my situation. Just some background info: I was born in Argentina, and lived there until I was 12 years old. There my parents decided to move to Israel due to the shitty situation in Argentina. Israel helped us like no other country would ever do. When we arrived, the government provided us with a roof for 3 months, and some money to survive until my parents got a job. It provided free Hebrew lessons for my parents, and the school system was really compressive with me and my brother.
Like most of you know, Israel is only able to exist thanks to it's army. And because of that, it's an obligation to serve in the army for 3 years. Well here is the problem. About 8 months ago (and almost 7 years after we moved to Israel) my parents asked me what I think about coming back to Argentina. And I said that I was cool with it as I quite missed it. The only problem that I had, was that I want to go to the army. Not as much as a patriotism thing, but to not feel like a leech and a deserter after all what Israel made for my family. So I just lied to myself, and said that I would go to the college in Argentina, and then go back to serve in the army. After some months in Argentina I got to the conclusion that if I'd go to the college here, I would not come back. So I'm facing a very hard decision. Should I go back to Israel on my own, and be a lone soldier (Israel would provide me with tickets to Argentina and one month each year to visit my family, and it would also provide me with a foster home)? It would mean wasting 3 years of my life, and eat shit for 3 years.
Or should I just stay in Argentina? It would mean having kind of a normal life, going to college in some months, but always living with the feel that I'm a leech, a deserter.
Basically, it's a question of Profit vs Beliefs. What should I sacrifice? There's a meme in Spanish, that says "When God closes a door, he opens a window". But damn sometimes it's hard to find the window.
en realidad que estas en una situación difícil, eh! comprendo que sientes el deber civil de hacer algo por ese país, ya que ellos hicieron mucho por tí y tu familia. Te entiendo, porque yo el otra vez fui a una tienda de guitarras; no había lugar en el estacionamiento y había un tráfico del demonio! así que me estacioné en el parking de un Burger King. Ya que salí dl Guitar Market, me dirigí al carro y metí la guitarra que acaba de comprar. Después me dieron ganas de ir al baño, así que fui al del Burger, aunque decía que era 'only for customers', pero, en fín, la vejiga manda! Ya cuando me iba sentí el deber de, pues, mínimo de comprar una hamburguesa (aunque, personalmente, prefiero las del Carl's Jr.), pues ellos me dieron lugar para mi carro y desagüe para mi orina, jeje. Por eso te entiendo... "...eso no tiene nada que ver, caleb! no se acerca ni siquiera un poco a la profundidad de este blog, y déjame decirte que es serio, eh! no digas estupideces! mejor ya deja de comentar, okay?"
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Between the sword and the wall. blog
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