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Tuesday, July 06, 2010

ditto: slut of pokemon

the thought came to me when i was playing pokemon on my DS and and i wanted to breed me some pokemon. i realized that ditto isn't very good for anything other than breeding my pokemon. i recently decided to change the name from "ditto" to "slut" simply because it will have sex with any pokemon. even the ones with small penises and no sex drive (i'm looking at you, slowpoke).

it's also pink which is, you know, the color of the "insides" of people.

also, this is by no means an insult. a ditto is useful since it takes care of breeding pokemon without needing to catch another one. not to mention that it takes care of the ugly pokemon's need for sexual desire like grimer, muk, or this stupid looking pokemon:
so, here's to you, ditto: the useful slut of pokemon.

1:55 am - 0 comments - 2 Kudos
Tuesday, August 11, 2009


Current mood: bitchy

4:48 am - 2 comments - 0 Kudos
Wednesday, August 05, 2009

zelda fans suck.

so, my day was going as it usually does. i log on to UG, mod the forums, get pissed off at a user and swear under my breath at a bunch of fucking idiots.

anyway, i stumble upon this thread: p?t=1175795

like usual, i closed it, because there is a relatively large final fantasy thread in the pit. i came across these posts: p=21044151&postcount=2 p=21044286&postcount=4 p=21044329&postcount=8 p=21044831&postcount=19 p=21045240&postcount=21

good, you guys like zelda. don't fucking go on threads regarding OTHER games that you would literally bend down to be sword fucked by link. i like zelda, too. but apparently you people couldn't resist getting a hard-on for people who have elf ears and wear medieval clothing.

there's no reason to say final fantasy is better than zelda or zelda is better than final fantasy ... THEY'RE TWO DIFFERENT GAMES. although, the love for zelda games has become ridiculous.

ocarina of time was wonderful, a well accomplished game indeed. then they released majora's mask. ok, same concept but you can wear masks! ... which make you different. it was also fun. then they released wind waker, which was basically ocarina of time with cel-shaded graphics and islands. the twilight princess was pretty good, too, since it was also another iteration of ocarina of time but this time we were given the new and improved wii motion controls which actually made the game unbearable for me (i for one like to sit on my lazy ass and experience my life wasting away while playing video games).

actually, now that i think about it, every zelda game has the same exact concept. boy is living regular life, boy becomes adult and has to leave because something bad has happened, boy learns about ganondorf, boy pulls master sword, boy has to run some more errands, boy kills ganondorf.

EVERY. SINGLE. GAME. i have to experience the same characters and same enemies. the stories are practically the same, as well.

i don't know how nintendo earns your respect by releasing the same re-hashed game every 4 years or so. all they do is slightly change the story and graphics. in zelda's case, they change and swap out some different items (ocarina for the baton, epona for the boat). these are the same people who rag on grand theft auto for practically releasing another game which happens to be a re-hash of previous releases.

there's nothing wrong with zelda. in fact, many companies do this such as the halo series. all the FPS games tend to have the exact same concept.

i just don't get the respect that everyone throws at zelda.
5:01 pm - 7 comments - 2 Kudos
Friday, July 11, 2008

best movie scenes ever

these are my favorite and i would love to share it with you people:

jesus scene from the big lebowski
i think no matter when, whenever someone says "jesus" i'll quickly say, "you said it man!" there are so many amazing quotes in this scene

revenge scene from rushmore
there are many great scenes in this film, but this one seems to stand out the most. maybe it's the who playing in the background, or maybe it's bill murray and his awesome bentley. whatever it is, it works.

cocaine scene from annie hall
this scene is priceless. just as the cocaine is glorified, woody allen sneezes on it.

final monologue in raging bull
i don't know if you've wondered why de niro is praised so much in the film industry. if you are a little skeptical, watch this scene. better yet, watch the entire film. seriously, de niro ranks as one of the best actors ever. he practically made scorsese's movies what they are today.

that's all i can think of ... and all i can find. hope you enjoy them all! :wavey:
5:32 pm - 4 comments - 2 Kudos
Monday, June 23, 2008

a few things i noticed.

Current mood: accomplished yet aggravated

before i start this, you probably are thinking "paint gtfo! you have votes to count"

well i'm done with that. and yeah ... expect the awards thread to release soon.

anyway, i just thought i'd share my thoughts that occurred to me while i was counting

metal forum

is it just me, or did the metal forum call each other and plan this whole voting thing out? they all voted for each other. it's not a problem, but it seems that this would be the first time this ever happened. i mean, the UG chat did this all the time, so it's no surprise to me. which brings me to my next topic:

divided we fall
ug chat seems like the users are in their own cahoots. yes, i've only been a member for like 2 years or so ... but when i began going in there, the people seemed to know everyone and the conversations were a lot more interesting and more fun just because everyone liked each other. a couple years ago, the entire chat got itself to vote SpacedOut (female) both most attractive male and female. maybe it's my inactivity in chat, but i've noticed too many one-on-one conversations. plus, not all the chatwhores even voted in this year's thread, which is a huge disappointment, in my opinion. and because of that (yes i'll give out spoilers) magero, someone who i've never seen in #ultimate-guitar, wins chatwhore of the year. i have no problem with him, in fact he seems like a pretty alright person, but a chatwhore is one who visits #ultimate-guitar frequently.

who the fuck are these users
ever since i became a CC, i've lost track of ALL users. throughout counting, i was like "who the hell are these users" some i've just discovered, because they post in the forbidden forums (metal forum, blues & jazz, musician talk, etc.) and i never saw the people whom i know the most (some people from chat and a lot of the people from alternative/indie).

hopefully, if i'm still around next year, things would turn out a lot better.

/end bitching
4:53 am - 0 comments - 0 Kudos
Sunday, May 25, 2008

something amazing happened

Current mood: optimistic

so i ordered final fantasy viii off it was $19.99. I have amazon prime through my brother, so i get free 2-day shipping, but that's not the special part.

I WAS NOT CHARGED TAX! normally i do, for like CDs and other media, but not i can spend that extra $1.40 on a quart of gas. recession ftw!

life's good :)
6:05 am - 6 comments - 0 Kudos
Sunday, January 13, 2008

fan mail

Current mood: chipper

Ok ... so after warning people for spam and such, I expect to get some kind of mail from recently warned or banned users. I decided to share, because they're funny.

User: organic remains
Fuck you asshole, The Jesus Lizard fucking rocks, you just can't handle the truth, FUCK YOU:angry::no:
God bless the Jesus Lizard:headbang:
and fuck you:finger:

The Jesus Lizard rock, lol.

User: Nightkeeper
Topic: Rock On You Loser
:haha: Rock on  you loser :haha:
Show me how you can play the guitar


User: boor
Topic: Ya ok
what good would that do? your boyfriend probably runs the site, , you fucking cock choker. i'll just read this stuff at, that's where you homos get the stuff for your site anyway. Don't act like you have "connections" other than the ones between you and your boyfriends' 2 incher. later fag

*3 incher.

User: saturns_bassman
Subject: Hello
Suck a dick you fucking jackass. I posted one shitty comment to a dude that sucks dick at tabbing a song, and I get bitched at by UG for what? Telling that asshole the truth. Go fuck yourself you faggot.

Thanks and keep up the support!

User: suxisthoe
Subject: suck it
suck a cock u faggit ass homo

*faggot. :)

User: Patrick244
Subject: The Status of Your Account at Ultimate-Guitar
Ahhh. What would I ever do now that you have deleted my account? My whole world is falling apart. You fuck head. You think I really care you deleted my account? I don't even fucking use it. he he. Oh wow, you really got me. Good one. Piece out homie. I got better things to do, you know like kicking hair metal band's asses. Motley Crue never, METALLICA forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Later. Good talking to you! Goodbye forever!

Well, I agree, hair metal does indeed suck.

User: xsamhain

enjoy my b&

blah blah blah, cry moar. paint it black sucks, rolling stones suck, UG sucks. now fuck off and enjoy block.

oh and MODS = FAGS

block? Is that supposed to be a shorter term for black cock?

User: ???
nope, this was in context, i am actually gay so therefore there was no insult. take the warning off my account immediately or i'll have to pursue legal action.

Will do.

User: Gundersmoot

Fuck you then. Your an asshole. I wasn't even vulgar. Everyone has a right to share there fucking opinions. Lick my fuzzy balls you asshole.

All That Remains  : The Fall of Ideals  :  Six


I wish I was free of this
I see her in my dreams
Wish that she wasn't there

But she still haunts me and I

Still feel her breath on me
Still want to taste her skin
But I know that would kill me

No damn her, still I choke on her lies
Still Reeling from her last caress her goodbye

Oh how this sickens me
This wretched fools affair
I can't erase this from me

And now it permeates
And every thought I feel
The anger writhes in my soul

No damn her, still I feel my stomach turn
Choke back hold my head high I'm strong

No damn her, still I choke on her lies
Not reeling I'm strong


I wish I was free of this

Aww how poetic, did you write it yourself?

User: Holywars83

fuck you up your stupid ass. Rock and Roll being policed are you the PMRC?

ban me. your sight sucks anyway and most of the tabs are wrong. BTW is this Tipper Gore? I run a blog website through my work and we encourage free speech. They are just words, nobody is threatening violence, its all very innocent. And if you actually took the time to look at the blogs from the beginning, i just stated that the nominees were awful and that metal was taking a backseat to rap. Then the UG community called me a moron for saying that so i was simply defending myself. Oh, how's life from the confounds of your mother's basement?

Hey, i was a complete dick to you and you handled it professionally. so let your boss know that you deserve a promotion.

Hah! I rule!

User: bricktopra3

Please ban me then, your site sucks anyway.

That's not nice :(

User: Boor

let's make it official, homo


User: Unknown

fuk u dik hed!

Fuk u cok sucka!

<_< >_>

2:32 pm - 16 comments - 13 Kudos