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Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Operation: Folua

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I for one, am sick of all the freaking idiots of the world!
I also know that I'm not the only one, and that is why we (myself and my cohort of masterminds) have decided to implement 'operation: folua'
(Folua = F*ck off and leave us alone)
Think about it, idiots are costing the world billions of dollars every year.
- They contribute nothing to society, in that; they 'idiot' up the place
- They breed, and now the population of idiots far exceeds the population of intelligent people
 (sub point) Idiots breeding may or may not (but most often does) result in an idiot child being born, however, the manner in which a child is raised is paramount in whether they turn out to be an idiot themselves, or someone intelligent.
-  Idiots are an economic concern; they most often contribute nothing in the way of labour, or production in economies. Thus, the nations government needs to hand out welfare payments, which in turn subtracts from the potential benefits it could provide to 'functional society', in the form of public amenities, etc. 
Besides the lack of individual contribution to the economy, and to society, the idiots are subtracting from the economy in yet more ways:
- Idiots will commonly find themselves in situations where they require rescue. For example, that lady who jumped in to the polar bear enclosure at a german zoo, during feeding time. Or the idiot who got himself trapped off the side of a cliff, with a barrier, and a big red sign that said "do not cross barrier - unstable"

Given the fact that human decency (and law suits) still exist, the portion of intelligent people in the world, have to then rescue these idiots from the situation they find themselves in, as a result of their idiocy.
The sum of all the costs involved in the rescue are astounding, and all for the sake of one idiot. So with the combined population idiots in the world, it is clear that they pose a serious threat to world economies, and to ourselves.
Costs involved in rescuing idiots include:
- Cost of equipment, such as helicopters, cars, life vests, medical equipment, as well as everything else that rescuers must take with them
- Cost of renewal; fuel for all vehicles, and new equipment must be purchased regularly
- Cost of wages; rescuers need to be paid for their services, and wages don't come cheap. They could be as much as 1000+ dollars per week, per individual. Those individuals may also have families who also need to be provided for..
This list of costs goes on and on, but this is just a sample.
Clearly, the cost of having idiots in society are astronomical.
You may think that although they effect your countries economy, they do not effect you... wrong!
The effects of idiots in society weigh down on each and every individual. Because of the negative effect they have on economies, they are doing damage to the day-to-day life-style of all of us.
Idiots can cause:
- higher inflation
- high interest rates
- numbness of the mind, from over exposure to them
as well as innumerable other effects.
Idiots also institue a large percentage of the worlds law suits. They pay the lawyers in their welfare payment money, and make claims that cost society millions.
Surely, the least they could do, is to say "I need compensation for my own idiocy"
As a result of all the years of human history, where we have been subjected the idiocy of individuals, and the consequences of their idiotic tendencies, we have decided to implement "operation: folua"
To save society from the ramifications, and detriments of having idiots in our communities, 'Operation: Folua' will:
- Remove the idiots from population centres around the globe
- Re-locate the idiots to a new, as yet unpopulated island, which we have named "Folua". In Folua, the idiots are then free to 'stupid' themselves to death - We are not murderers after all, we would not simply kill the majority of the population of the world.
The island of Folua is home to no endangered animals, but has a large variety of wildlife, such as hippos
(Note: Hippos kill more idiots per year than sharks, crocodiles, vending machines and ball point pens combined)
(Another note: You would be amazed how many people are killed per year by ball point pens and vending machines per year... but some people are just idiots...)
We understand that for this project to be efficient, we need to monitor both the populations of our 'new world' and of 'Folua'. So these policies will also be implemented:
- At birth, children are inspected for their innate intelligence.
- Children who do not meet the minimum intelligence quota are given 3 years to get 'up to standard' (we do not expect einstein's, but boundaries must be made)
- Folua will also be monitored, and children who show intelligence, will be allowed proper education, and when able to make the decision, they may choose whether to come back to civilised society or not.
- Yearly inspections of everyone else must also be made. Anyone who falls below intelligence quota, but cannot give a suitable reason for doing so (like being on prescription meds, etc) will be shipped out to Folua
Thank you to anyone who has read this, may your days be free of idiots
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