damn-right!

Location: West Midlands
Hours: No early mornings
Wage : Yes thanks, that would be nice.
Work Pattern: Abstract

Duration: As long as it takes.


Description
Must have some degree of humanity, a basic grasp of empathy will do. Duties will include being able to process large amounts of bullshit, being able to accurately calculate and distribute wages fairly. Must have low expectations to avoid disappointment and most importantly must be able to recognise creative genius and artistic license.

What do I offer in return?

I am able to work outside of the common confines of qualifications. Due to my chosen lack of higher learning, I am a sponge.   Ready and willing to absorb new material and able to think and respond using my own personal logic in such a way, that is interestingly original in a world full of textbook-repeating-suit-wearing monkeys. I have a good knowledge of typing, computer use and communication due to large amounts of my own spare time spent expanding my knowledge via internet discussion groups. I am able to demonstrate perserverance and enjoy challenges (for example-I have spent many years mastering pacman)

I enjoy sports such as walking to the kitchen for the corkscrew and I am able to exercise personal choice-I continue to smoke despite being made graphically aware of the alleged dangers. I am willing to receive good money for little work and I am also willing to compromise social morality and ethics in return for money or alcohol.

References are available from the bloke behind the counter in the off license on the corner and my mum.