-The consistent presence of a known or unknown individual standing behind you coughing and/or scowling
-Various "stop-smoking" leaflets and nicotine replacement items appear around your house.
-Ashtrays and Lighters keep disappearing.
-Some people report an uncomfortable presence of smugness that is difficult to pinpoint
-General feelings of guilt, irritability and restlessness
-Friends and family keep suggesting ridiculous notions of fresh air, extensive living and lung capacity.
If You have experienced 3 or more of these symptoms, its highly likely that you have an anti-smoker in your group. Unfortunately this is a common problem that can often be difficult to treat. There are some measures you can take to relieve the symptoms though...
-Allegedly smokers "smell", so smoke more. Hopefully the increased aroma of stale tobacco will be strong enough to act as a deterrant.
-Put up "smoking" signs, this is a technique often practised as an attack by anti-smokers, but we can be much more polite. Something simple like "fuck off I'm smoking" will do.
-Remember that smokers die younger, you havent got to put up with this for very long.
-Avoid places where anti-smokers may visit. These include hospitals, doctors surgeries, salad bars and gyms.
-Always have a positive attitude, you are an intelligent person who has the ability to exercise personal choice. Dont be bullied by friends and colleagues with selfish intentions.
-Always remember, today, about one in three adults, or 1.1 billion people, smoke. You are not alone.
and dont forget, a lit cigarette is manouverable and aerodynamic enough for ramming into the eye of one of those spotless-lunged bastards, should it be necessary.
coincidence??
Don't you hate it when non smokers come up to you coughing while you're smoking? I mean, how cruel? Do they go up to crippled people dancing too? You fucking sadists.
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Anti-Smokers... blog
