arsonite
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 3:04pm
Ooh that's a good one. A total documentation of how Christmas has become so commercialized over the years. The meaning of Christmas is not about all the stuff you get or how much money you spend, it's being with the ones you love. Those are very good words kudos to you my man. 
I'm spending this Christmas with my family we're all going on vacation and I don't think I'll be around UG much in the next while so here's hoping you have a good one too! Merry Christmas!  quote
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arsonite
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 3:05pm
Forgot to click the kudos button.  quote
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poopsmith666
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 3:07pm
As much as I love Christmas, I can agree that it reeally has gotten out of hand quote
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noxiosimitator
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 3:21pm
it has some words in it that I don't understand..
but it sure is an awsome tekst, mainly because its true.
nice work :cheer:s
+2 kudos quote
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jj1565
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 3:21pm
hey, good morning. nice take on christmas. i dont know.
i think we all have to be responsible for our own christmas experience. people have been divided up into classes forever. teach your children to give and you can have a wonderful experience, in almost any living condition. Merry Christmas  quote
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phantom1
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 3:32pm
You changed it to 'tears fall on deaf ears'!
I really like the first stanza, now that I know what D.I.N.K is. You already knew that I didn't really like this one, but I think it worked out fine and as long as you're happy with it..  quote
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Metal claw
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 4:10pm
I liked the wide spaces in between each scene. It makes the poem inviting. quote
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kaptink
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 4:24pm
I would prefer Christmas in Hollis by Run D.M.C. quote
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stepco12345
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 4:33pm
I really liked that. I agree with you too.
Merry Xmas.  quote
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XibanezedgeX
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 4:36pm

Beautiful!
People just need to step back sometimes and think about what Christmas is and ask themselves if all "this" (what ever it happens to be) is really nessicary.
Merry Christmas SYK, hope you have a great one.

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Guitardude19
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 4:49pm
Dude that was a very dark poem. I like it a lot. I cant find the words but its touched a spot. quote
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Jackal58
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 4:59pm
Perspective.
Reminds me. I gotta go get the damn batteries.
Loved it man. quote
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Dave_Mc
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 5:03pm
wow that's morbid. quote
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Sceeb-O
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 5:09pm
Very nicely done. I liked it. quote
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SOADrox429
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 5:14pm
That's good. I agree with what you're trying to say here. Christmas has become far too commercialized. quote
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iain4444
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 6:26pm
ahah i like it There's some really great lines in there, and there's a few that you should consider working on a bit : I'm not sure how full a crit you want here (though I'd guess your answer will be 'as full as you feel comfortable doing'. Heh, it's actually starting to feel like christmas; I just had this 'hmm, christmas' feeling lol, first one so far. In response to the general idea presented: I only got gifts for six people this holiday season, and I only actually purchased one of them (no stealing involved lol). I was in the Eaton's centre in downtown toronto two days ago, and it was _insane_. I definitely spent the rest of my day reflecting on how unbelievably commercialized christmas has become - nothing new of course, but it was just a massive example i guess.
Sorry i haven't hit you back in so long with that pm you sent me - I will at some point today. Happy holidays  quote
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RHCP94
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 6:49pm
Happy Festivus. quote
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Sanctus Ignis
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 6:55pm
MEGA KUDOZ!!1
I love this man. Wonderful explanation on the commercialization of this holiday. Ahh, the world! quote
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Nathan_393
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 8:02pm
Nice man
I like all the metaphors in there quote
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OddOneOut
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 10:09pm
You just took me right back to when I spent christmas in the phillipines. It sickened me too see how much crap people were buying when I was at work, its the sort of thing you notice more when you've spent your holidays in a town built from corrugated metal. x quote
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the_random_hero
wrote on Dec 24th, 2007 11:56pm
Aww, warms my heart and stuff. Sort of makes me less angry that my parents spent 6x what they spent on me than my brother =/ quote
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Kensai
wrote on Dec 25th, 2007 12:05am
Very nicely done 
So I take it you had a bad christmas?  quote
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pAmpH
wrote on Dec 25th, 2007 12:49am
That was really really well done.
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hope's downfall
wrote on Dec 25th, 2007 1:16am
i read this when you first posted it in s+l and i really really like the revisions. i dont have much constructive to say here, you pretty much perfected it.
i do have to say, though, the ending feels a bit cheesy-hallmark-card for me. but don't worry, i'm sure that's largely due to the fact that i'm a cold cynical bitch. quote
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shigidab0p
wrote on Dec 25th, 2007 5:39am
This is very well done, I commend you. Reminds me of the tone of T.S Eliot, though he was quite a bit less direct. His "Journey of the Magi" is a kind of similar theme, it's the journey of the biblical magi from the point of view of one of them. quote
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Till From Kenig
wrote on Dec 25th, 2007 7:56am
It was difficult to understand some phrases with my knowledge of English, but I am impressed. It's great. I'll be waiting for next one. quote
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raindropsXroses
wrote on Dec 25th, 2007 8:22am
Wow, this is amazing, SYK. I reviewed it on your thread in S&L, and I mentioned this there, but... I recommend the song Holiday by James McMurtry. It's a great song that this poem totally reminds me of. The guitar is nice, and the lyrics are even better. quote
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VoodooChild15
wrote on Dec 25th, 2007 8:12pm
Now I feel like a bitch for complaining about getting a toiletries bag. Great stuff, I love the rhythm. quote
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Joshrocker48
wrote on Dec 27th, 2007 12:42am
You have a knack for this.
Great work man. Very wonderfully structured and it had a great rhythm.
I hope you had a content and fulfilling holiday.
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ZanasCross
wrote on Dec 28th, 2007 7:55pm
I've really enjoyed watching the evolution of this piece. It started out with so many solid ideas, but built with very shaky grammar and general style. This is so much better. There are still a few things we could be picky about but this really works and conveys quite a few good points all while story telling and using plain English. I think that's what I love most about it... no abstract metaphors, no crazy playing on words... just 'here it is, chew on it... its good."
Thanks for the shout.
-zach
(sorry that took so long... was internetless (kind of; dial-up *shudders*) quote
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Shabalaba
wrote on Dec 28th, 2007 9:30pm
Great man, you have a talent at writing poems quote
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abhishek21
wrote on Dec 29th, 2007 8:33am
Overall it's really nice . It has evolved like monkeys . i don't know why I didn't critique it. I guess I was busy .
Keep writing . Maybe I'll start writing soon. quote
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BGSM
wrote on Dec 30th, 2007 12:29am
That's really good, +2. quote
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Smiley-JLU
wrote on Dec 31st, 2007 7:17am
thats so deep. you should produce it. quote
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ss311
wrote on Dec 31st, 2007 1:06pm
+infinity for message and style. quote
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blu_flame34
wrote on Jan 3rd, 2008 2:15pm
Sorry for the late response- I just got back from a long trip 
I loved it though, particularly the ending. It's all so applicable- although in the repeats I couldn't help but hearing a Godfather-esque "on this, the day of my daughter's wedding". quote
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*kas
wrote on Jan 5th, 2008 6:01am
They sought praises and flatteries
But got insults and sneers.
Stupid Dad forgot batteries
On this,
The worst Christmas in years.
Very clever, great piece overall. quote
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vintage x metal
wrote on Dec 8th, 2008 3:08am
Lovely, babe, just lovely.
Cheers to you this holiday quote
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damskippy
wrote on Dec 17th, 2008 7:31pm
Thought provoking, both sad and inspirational. Thanks dude. quote
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Davo Ownz
wrote on Dec 24th, 2008 2:06am
On the streets of the City
more gritty than pretty,
three sons of a crackwhore,
there were four, then the gang war.
Only verse that didn't fit quote
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TAKMAN666
wrote on Dec 27th, 2008 7:14pm
Very nicely written. Sad though quote
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SMBoo28
wrote on Dec 31st, 2008 8:54pm
i love this
christmas has been corrupted from a holiday celebrating our Lord's birth as a man to a couple of presents at the end of the year. quote
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GothGirl666
wrote on Jan 3rd, 2009 5:50am
i remember my friend telling me about his last year. its really powerful. thanks for the add. quote
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salmon philippe
wrote on Feb 28th, 2009 6:41am
What more can I say after all these comments ?
Que dire de plus après tous ces commentaires ?
I remmember now that xmas is your birthday man !
"25 december 2025..."
It is always a pity to have your bithday on xmas...makes less presents
Wait a few years till you're born again, then it gets better quote
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