It got me thinking...I know at least a few people will be sad when I die. I don't want them to be. I want so much alcohol at my funeral that people drown in it (not literally, of course). I want people singing drunk, going into closets and random rooms for drunken secks, general partying (also some fighting). I want them to have fun, and remember me as that guy who had an awesome party for his funeral, not another person who made everyone depressed more than they were when he died.
lol i sk8 n this 1 time this cop told us to leave cuz we were sk8in
there n i punchd him in the face n we ran cuz he wuz gonna arrest us
thn we went 2 my friends house n got so drunk lol
Today I woke up in the middle of the night because I heard someone at
the door. Come to find out it's the police. Apparently my 14 year old
brother called the cops on my parents because he thought my mom was
being attacked. They were just having sex. MLIA.
Today, we got new neighbors. The girls name is Marie-Antoniette Carlton
and her brother is Paul Carlton. I just realized that their names spell
out MAC and PC... they are twins. Mind-Blown. MLIA.
Today I saw a tow truck getting towed. MLIA
Today, my mother told me that when I was little, I had
wanted grandparents, and since my biological grandparents were dead, I
took matters into my own hands. While she was working at a nursing home
she caught me trying to get through the double doors pushing the
wheelchair of a senile, sleeping old woman. She asked me what I was
doing and I said "Gettin' a new Grandma." At 4 years old I was trying
to kidnap old people. MLIA
Lately in school we've been doing this thing where we try to prove how
gullible everyone else is. I turned to a girl and said, "Your sock is
untied" and was surprised to hear her reply, "My socks actually have
laces". I looked down to see her socks and they were just regular
socks. When I looked back up she said nothing but had this huge grin on
her face. That backfired. MLIA
Today, in my health class, my teacher walked in to our classroom to
find two macho football players chasing each other around the room.
When she got them settled down, she asked them why they were running
around. One of them, almost in tears, said, "He told me the ending to
New Moon!!" I laughed. A lot. MLIA
Today, I was talking to my youth minister and his daughter. I was
talking about how I tripped over my own feet quite often. The daughter
proceeds to laugh, and says, "Hahaha, that's funny!!" And without
missing a beat my youth minister said, "That's what Jesus said when he
made your face." Greatest comeback ever. MLIA
Today, my mom was giving my grandma a haircut. My grandma was sitting
with her legs crossed, so her shoulders were uneven. My mom goes,"
alright you gotta uncrossed your legs." without skipping a beat my
grandma goes "JEEZ WHAT HAIR ARE YOU TRIMMING?" I don't think I've
laughed that hard in a long time. I love my grandma. MLIA.
Today, I was typing an essay and my cat was sitting on the desk,
watching the progression of each word. A few moments later, she put her
paw to the screen and meowed loudly. I looked where she "pointed" and
saw I had missed a typo that probably would have made the sentence
REALLY confusing. I corrected it, and my cat sat down and began to
purr. I am severely creeped out. MLIA
Today, I had to choose between a strawberry flavored
Dum Dum and a mystery flavored Dum Dum. I decided to be adventurous and
choose the mystery flavor; it was strawberry flavored. MLIA
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Primus2112's blogs, last updated : December 24, 2009
