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Saturday, October 03, 2009

expiriment (my perspective) / heart (her perspecti

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I am selfish to the core.  I am capitalist
at heart.  But i cannot feel the pain of others.
It is something i do not understand.
Yet somewhere in this bag of bones,
somewhere in time, i made the choice
that sacrifice for the good of others
was my purpose.

somehow, i must steer
this hulking mass of neurons and stimulati
in front of a car,
partially for dramatic effect, and
to save a life.
It's got to be my body that i spend.
Skin grows back, but my brain won't grow at all.
Sometimes i swear
it's all i have to give.

And my self esteem.
It's not needed to reach my goal.
I always figured that
i hadn't worked hard enough
to deserve happiness just yet.
So each blow my self esteem takes
is another helpful reminder,
an alarm clock to the soul,
to shake me away from my worldy pleasure
and remind me of why i'm still here.

When he put his hands on Rachel,
I snapped at the opportunity.
I flew with strength both human and otherwise.
And for a second,
the last second,
I think I fell in love with her.
thank you Rachel.
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