With shaking hands and blurry eyes I try one last time To fix what's already been broken Time and time again I replay in my head Those words that never left your lips There's a blinding ache in my chest An emptiness I can't seem to fill All because of you.
I clutch at my ribcage, gritting my teeth Begging for some resemblance of mercy But it won't come; it never does The pain never subsides, it only dulls I lie awake night after sleepless night Trying to figure out how to mend my shattered heart All because of you.
I sit staring at the wall As the seconds creep by like days I'm just a shell of what I used to be; empty, lifeless, broken The blood glistens in the pale morning light And those words still echo in my head All because of you All because of you.
I'm not entirely sure what prompted me to write this. But I did. Just some random tidbits about me..
-I have very low self-esteem, and I'm quite stubborn about it. No matter how much you try to tell me otherwise, I will always secretly believe that I'm ugly and worthless.
-I'm a bit of a perfectionist; I'm terrified of failing, be it in college, relationships, or anything else.
-I'm always afraid that the people I love will abandon me at any given time.
-I never show anyone the songs I write. I believe it's all complete shit.
-I agonize over songs and papers until I deem them "perfect."
-I'm rather shy in person. It takes me a while to warm up to people. There's a select few people that have seen the real me.
-I'm socially awkward. You have no idea how tough it is for me to go up and meet new people, even though I love doing so.
-I fall for people too hard and too often. I seek affection because I want to believe that someone thinks I'm worth it when I sure as hell do not.
-I'm a naturally depressed person, but I usually try my best to hide it because I don't want people to worry about me.
-I'm a bitch. I try to hide it because I hate the fact that I am, but it usually comes boiling out when I'm mad or hurt.
-I make fun of the typical blonde college girls that I see on campus, but I secretly envy them. I'd give one of my kidneys to be that confident.
-I fear that I'll die alone in the world and promptly be forgotten.
-I'm the most modest person you'll ever meet. I don't see myself as anything other than average.
| My Profile
MoshPitRock's blogs, last updated : December 3, 2009
