This blog will evidently be the result of a very uneventful day at work. I sit here at my desk next to a window overlooking the high-rises of Sydney’s central business district. The structure across the road is still being built but is arising quickly. The days pass by so swiftly to the effect that it seems the building is growing before us.
I sometimes watch the workers hanging around at the fencing to the side; I watch others hanging around too- there are three or four schoolboys that sit on the ground right at the end of an open-air station that I pass on the train, I look at them and wonder what their lives are like, sometimes wishing I was one of them.
Down the main street to either side are intersections at which people cross in an ‘X’ shape. When I was new to working in the city, I thought it a magnificent sight. I still do. There is always movement on the streets and sidewalks (sometimes less than one would desire: get outta the way!) and it reminds me of blood moving through a body. Always going this way or that, always with a purpose. There are more formally-suited people than anyone else, though you do often spot teenagers in strange and wacky attire.
I prefer people in the city. They value order and etiquette. Most of the time, they are cluey and considerate. The drivers, on the other hand- I’ve never seen such disregard for the road rules. Actually, I have, that was when I lived around the corner from a private school.
The train station tends to be the same, in that there is a rush of people, I’ve heard commented by people going in the opposite direction, "We’re going against the tide here". I’ve thought the same at one point or another. It makes me wonder, with all this life and movement, am I really going against any major tide? My sense of realism says no, not at all, don’t kid yourself. But something inside me says that I’m different, so very different and it’s because I can’t connect with people. Because I just don’t think the same.
All of that is rather empty rhetoric, I suppose, with the many nuances to be taken into consideration. I could write a novel about all that I think and feel (in fact I’m attempting to) but I won’t. I won’t even expect that anyone has the patience to read this far, concentration is a difficult thing to find these days. It just feels good to spill all that there is to access in my mind right now. I don’t do so often for fear of what I can’t do. Fear is a big part of my life, such a human trait probably caused by surroundings and upbringing... because after all, I’m just a product of my environment. I don’t understand what it’s like to be disadvantaged, or have lost anything great; I don’t know what it’s like for others, but when speaking and relating I try and tap into universal truths common to all humans. In just the past few years I believe I’ve learnt a few- and hopefully in the coming years will learn many more.
Dear UG, I can hardly believe I’ve produced so much text in less than – I’ve lost track of time – half an hour or so. Beautiful things can happen when you have nothing to do. Don’t worry, it’s not always this boring; just on certain days such as this sunny albeit freezing Monday morning.
I love watching people. It boggles my mind sometimes, when I think about how complicated (it isn't really, in comparison to some) my life is and realize the same intricacy as a result of things like crazy relatives, holiday traditions, jobs, parents, just "life experiences" in general, applies to any random person on the planet. Sometimes I feel like I'd like to know their background as well as I know mine, but of course that never happens, typically I just get little snippets of information...feels as if I'm solving some sort of giant puzzle at times. Makes life interesting, I suppose. omnipotence is overrated, amirite??
(man...I used the word "like" an obscene amount of times just now >_> )
I look at others all the time and wonder what their lives are like. We all live in the same small world but the amount of diversity on it is amazing. Also, concentration is difficult to find, especially in the pit.
On behalf of myself, I'd just like to say this: +1. I know how it is to get completely lost in one's thoughts, just to contemplate upon life in general. I've never written it down though, I might have to try that once
Lately I haven't been very active on UG (my mind has been wandering, and I've been devoting a lot of spare time to guitfiddle practice, not to mention work) but I've just realised I always have time to read/follow a Le_Bunny blog/sig link.
Good on you for keeping this site interesting. I would expand on what I like about this blog but I'd just be rehashing everything everyone else has said.
Anyway, I'm throwing a couple of kudos your way. Keep up the interesting shit! :
i was humbled after a visit to kyoto and to Tokyo when i thought i knew what a city was like from TV or even the city that we have (honolulu) watching my surroundings can keep me entertained indefinitely (with a mp3 player). At times i tell myself its best to be doing those things then watching, but i still find myself quite satisfied having seen it. Experiencing things are great though i will still admit. I wouldn't want to be a city dweller, but it makes a great place to visit.
you were right, concentration is hard. i lost it right before i read that line.
when i was in my younger days, my mind was going at a 1000 miles an hour. stream of consciousness exercises were great at organizing them, but this became a habit(i thought it would be a benefit to myself to think about everything) and it ended up giving me years of insomnia and some anxiety. but the things that i wrote out of the blue were just jumbles of random thoughts(obvious) and repeats of the same issues but reworking the idea/solutions.
You could write a novel like this with a good editor to help you organize all your random thoughts haha. But your writing style is intriguing to some, like me. I am dead tired but I had no trouble concentrating on your blog.
You could write a novel like this with a good editor to help you organize all your random thoughts haha. But your writing style is intriguing to some, like me. I am dead tired but I had no trouble concentrating on your blog.
I love stopping what I'm doing sometimes and watching people, imagining what is on their mind. This blog reminded me of that, I wish I got to do it more, but I live in a town of about 3000.