Well, I have been a bit ignorant of the consequences, either that or I chose to ignore them. Now, I may be paying for them, although I hope it's not to late. If you're wondering what, or if you even care, I think I may be developing gangrene.
A while back, I had this terrible reaction. I'm not sure as to what, I suspect it may have been the sweat mixed with the irritation of Old Spice underarm deorderant gel. Anyway, under both of my arms, I developed this.... Infection. Slowly, after a while, it went from a bad rash to something more. As the days went by, it started to stink a lot more, and gradually I'd wake up in the mornings with this liquid in my pits. I had no idea what it was, but I suspected it as the source of the foul stench. The stench of something that had died, rot.
Within two weeks, I noticed this wet, red spot under my left arm. Upon closer inspection, it was the muscle inside my body. There was a hole in my arm, no more than a few millimetres in diameter. Why I didn't go to the doctor immediately, or why I even still show some hesitation, I do not know. Due to my mentality at the time, I simply put some Polysporin on it, and continued on with my ignorance.
It was nearly two weeks before I went to the doctor, and it was simply because my mother had come one morning to discover me sleeping with my arms open, revealing the predicament. My arm pits were almost raw, under both. Although the right side seemed to have the worst of it. I could see a chunk of muscle clearly, with the hole that was there. It must've been an inch wide, and in length also. On the other arm, there were several smaller holes, with the same effect. I could see the inside, and both gave off the same putrid stench.
"Why didn't go come in earlier?"
I could hear the questions by both my mother, and the doctor. There was no good answer I could give, because I myself did not know the answer.
According to the doctor, it was a fungus, but it was one in which she had never heard of before. Nothing like this had ever been recorded, of a fungus that remained stationary on one part of my body, and never spreading, yet getting continually worse. They did what they could. For a long time it had worked, she had given me this cream and some pills. She said that the pills would supposedly make the infection worse, but would help my body heal more, this too I did not understand, but I did not dare question her. The cream she said would be extremely helpful. It was, within a month, the infection had been nearly ridden from my arms. The few small holes remaining were healing. Though I neglected to take the pills at the proper times when I had been prescribed. I feel this is why I still have it. The smell was still unbearable, and I tried to wash it out many times. Though the doctor said the water is probably what aggravated the infection to the level it had gone before I went it.
Well, after a time it had healed completely under both arms, but then there was this small boil that popped up in the same spot occasionally, and I'd pop it leaving a small hole again in my arm. Though it would heal, so after a while I simply dismissed it as another sprang up. This was not the case, it stayed open, I simply thought it would take a while longer this time around. Then, one morning, I awoke to this immense pain under my right arm, and I felt under, and I had an even bigger boil there. One that hurt at even the slightest movement. It wasn't a boil, the doc told me. It was an abscess, caused by my reckless eating habits, which fluctuated immensely as some days I wouldn't even eat. I had a vitamin deficiency, and was at a risk for diabetes. This was a little over a month ago, on May 5th. For all I know, I very well might have diabetes, which is why my body acts like this. So, they got rid of the thing, popped it, but they missed the small hole left from the prior boil, but it was black from the dried blood, so they may have missed it. I didn't remind them, once again I don't know why.
The hole where they drained it healed, then a little more than a week later, it reopened. It's getting worse, yet I still have not gone to the doctor. I will though, Monday I figure. My aunt is a little bit more easier to live with when it comes to these things, my mother worries too much, despite my age.
Some time earlier today, I saw this black spot on the wound, a small spot, but a spot nonetheless. I assumed it was a piece of lint from my shirt, and grabbed at it. Nothing came off, but the spot remained. Now, a little over 10 minutes before I decided to write about it, I examined it. Still black, though it looks bigger, not much bigger, but still bigger.
I'm scared, I don't want to lose my arm. Not my good arm anyway, how could I write? Play video games? Play guitar? Or even jerk off?
For whatever reason, I keep denying it, and as a result, I may lose my arm. The two words echoing in my head... "vitamin deficiency."
Bastard.
The only thing worse than the frequent pain is the stench.
Remember kids, eat your fruits and vegetables. This might just happen to you.
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